Frigid Footprints Etched in Time

Frigid Footprints Etched in Time

Time to reflect find meaning

Ready and gather strength for future seasons

Time to live in a present moment built on the past

To find bliss each day in just being

In feeling hoping loving

In gently holding to patience and faith

Touching natures surround unbound

Time is infinite change in an expanding universe

Like the lake surface blanketed in snow from transient storm

Change in flakes and crystals of water mixing moving gathering

Little twisters of white move in gusty gestations

Infinite equations of changing destination and motion

Eyes watery and face worn with lines of season old and the days cold

Manmade mirror of glass in shore side ice rink

Altered the blanket by pulling it back for gliding space

Tuck in the edges to border and shape

Sore eyes gaze in wonder from weathered countenance

Great spirit of nature and all uses a whisk brush of gust

A vehicle of wind and a wispy medium of snow

To draw-paint a picture in the tenor of the season and flux of time

Transposing a lake shore rink into an ever changing etch a sketch image of life

Shaken by wintry blast infinite design is cast

Late Fall Boat Ride

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DSCN1410Oct Nov 2012 330Boat Ride on a Sunny Windy Sunday

Fall is changing
Winds have pushed and pulled against it
Side currents and cutting winds buffit
as I cut the engine
Drift to the wind’s whine and whim
Beware the shore and hidden rock
Trust experience
Focused keen observation
a close call but a shift in the wind
moves us to safety
Two paddlers in a canoe
battle and shift then give in and drift to natural intent
Gusts and gestations of the nature of October late
Drifting past to future and season to season
Leaves have changed in color
Fallen in flashy death
Float move and shift as we do from where they land on the water
To become little ships and armadas at the mercy of the months manifestations
Bursts of beautiful in the last trees to change
The brilliant reds orange and yellow
have given over to the ambers and browns
Once again we drift too close to danger
turn over the engine shift and throttle up
Set a new course in adjustment to wind and the chops of lake surface
The boats ripples are lost in wave translation
Mark a course each day
with patience and without fear in mindful meditation of the present
Warrior ready we tie to the dock
and await whatever the seasons next present

The Exothermic Energy of Seasons

Days of Spring Rain End

Hampton Beach Sunrise

Great Blue Herons Wings span the seasons

The Exothermic Energy of Seasons

Sunshine start to another day

Evening last lit with burning branches, glowing embers, music and moonlight
A fire of our own

Embrace the light of soul spirit rising

Glow meets rays expanding
Convergence of energy in the present, the gift

Synergy promises potential for another day

Warmth of nature and love intertwined
Wisteria vines enhanced in a mix of Spring and Summers

Soul spirit rising

Twenty Seven Year Old Dreams–Against The Wind

Going through the door to another time I find myself 27 years old again in summer.

Twenty Seven Year Old Dreams—Against the Wind

The fish were not coming near our boat yesterday. Perhaps the intensity of my dreams was keeping them away. I used an open ended roll of film and could have taken as many pictures as I wished. I did with my minds eye. Such a reality is felt out on the open sea. My dreams were out there, I could feel them pulling me on as I gathered strength for the storm.

I dreamed of hitting the road to island and mountain sanctuaries of spirit. Today I am on the road from Martha’s Vineyard Island to Jackson NH in the White Mountains. Dreams tempered and shaped by uncomfortable reality that I am rapidly moving toward even greater change. A soul searching vacation thinking about loose ends and trying to make amends to old friends. Sorting myself out in feeling thought and in running the roads and realizing that you just can’t have it all. You just don’t need it all. (Credit this line to Bob Seeger)

My traveling companions on the boat from the island were special people, a juggler and a fool. What eyes on the world. Felt good to meet them, share the view together for a short while. Foggy this morning yet we found light spots of life and laughed. Talked of serious things without being serious about it. The fool is a mirror of life reacting to what he sees and feels helping others to laugh at themselves and stop being so dramatic. Fools and jugglers are masters at getting others to lighten up. Take it easy and lighten up on your load. It’s not that bad if you take it slow, do your best and don’t forget to laugh. Move on in the face of change and uncertainty. I move on down the road to gather my backpack and head for the mountains.

What time is it anyway? What you make of it! Jackson NH, afternoon, it is time for getting my head together. My home customized Chevy Van is my room on wheels and feels so fine. The side door open acts as my window. The ride was smooth and timeless, an open day under high open sky. Listening to the music, taking it all in, learning to put it all together.

Knowing only that what has gone before my eyes this vacation has been beautiful. The realm of possibilities is immense and I became lost in the grandeur of an island dream. The road was open so I took it to the mountains to give ocean and island dreams room to expand. I have got to play my hand. Live free or you do begin to die. Shadow Captain and dark star are moving on and shining thru the fog to see beyond immediate reality. Blend of past present and future as the road and life go on. Balance is hard to maintain as situations shift and sway in the wind. I am holding on yet giving enough to maintain the balance. The summer wind today is clean and free flowing. I can see the love that will be.

Mountain day dream given room to expand brings me back to the island fair in West Tisbury. Such a wonderful parade of people and almost everyone makes an appearance. The island women are so natural and strong in their beauty. The island is reflected in them. They are so fine in country dress and bare feet. My dreams soar and time opens and my picture of the world becomes so close to perfect for a short part of the year. The fair is a celebration before the work of the harvest. It is a celebration of warm energy that has been built up thru the summer months. I was surely lost in the warmth. I could not open up to the possibilities the way wished not in the few days of vacation. Getting there gave me a time for reflection, a time open to looking at what has come to pass trying to shed light on what is ahead. It is a time to look at the whole of your existence in hopes of enhancing your reality. The broader the vision the wider the possibilities. Reflect and be glad for the way ahead. Dreams are never left behind. We are always moving toward them. We must do what we can, learn lessons and do some more. The pieces turn up as you go. Shifting and sorting, piecing it all together takes time.

Take it easy, take your time, have patience! The best is ahead but it will only be the best if we work towards making it that way every day. The road goes on, pieces of dreams to be found and mountain daydreams to give them room to expand.

© Ken Pothier

Written yesterday and today

Moonlit Fire In Spring

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Moonlit Fire Spring

Fire and moonlight driven thoughts
Evergreen firs and budding deciduous
The trees are a family, birds their children
Nests held gently, securely
Protected by branch, needle and expanding leaves
A high home with expansive view
Welcome to spring warmth
Arriving light, a fire to meet the waxing moon
Waning glow of a fine early spring day
Blue eyes a picture window to cloudless sky
Walk the dock, a man’s shadow shows in ripples outward
Expanding across the lake touch the moon in reflection
Quiet calm, night peepers sing their song to water mirror
New life growing in glow of warmer days
Birds, bugs, turtles, fish, loon, beaver, musk rat, great blue heron, duck, duck, goose
Return from cold season exile and hibernations
Frame spring and merge in living creation
Changing in daily miracles as each circle comes around in warmth
Robins expecting, chirp and frolic, work the nest building
In chipmunk fall food supply intensity
No eggs yet but driven by hopes and promise of new birth
Spring dressings, building to please
Soon baby bird breaks shell as seedling breaks ground
Man cracks open the door
Leaves kitchen table picture window
Blue eyes see

Loons in the morning mist

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Lake Loons in the morning mist 012I heard the loons in the dark before the dawn. The lake was shrouded in mist with cool air over warmer water providing the setting. The loon couple were cruising in the mist and provided the perfect muse for my nikon to play. A grand way to start the day. My goldens Zachary and Marcus sniffed out the early morning as I find I can cast a shadow before coffee. Peace!

A Letter of love to my daughter on her Birthday

I have written this letter in my head a thousand times for it is either my last hope fulfilled or my lost hope forever. Rebecca you have never been forgotten and you are thought of and loved by me each day. In my minds’ eye you are the one who always tried your best to be a good daughter and steer clear of trouble. I believe that you wanted nothing to do with making a scapegoat and victim out of me. Yes, you and I were both innocent victims of the madness and dysfunction which occurred. I believe you have survived the trauma and built a new life for yourself. I am proud of you now as I have always been for you doing your best under trying circumstances. I am glad that I was able to say, ‘I love you” the last time I saw you.

I reached out to J in November 2010 with a letter. It is 100% the truth but she rejected it outright in a letter from her lawyer threatening me. However, you are my daughter and daughters are forever. I have enclosed a copy of a framed picture of me on a birthday celebrating with my girls. It is next to my desk with other photos which I look at each day. Rebecca the love I see in your eyes is the love I feel for you. It is wrong to let that love be chained and imprisoned by a dysfunctional disconnect. I was never allowed to communicate my truth. I was shunned and abandoned by a family I truly loved and love still.

Each night I still say, “good night I love you.” Each morning I awake to another day without you.
I take some soulace in having kept journals each year of our life together as a family. I have taken a few quotes from the pages,
Journal pg.17-“Our family, It is an absolute wonder watching the girls grow and being a part of it.” [The saddest part is all that I have missed seeing in your lives during these years apart.]

Journal pg.41-“Today is warm, could be 60°with a touch of spring. H and Rebecca are playing make believe with their little people. J is registering Rebecca for kindergarten. I will miss having Rebecca around the house during the day-she is a part of the sunshine of my life. I will savor watching them grow and try to appreciate each trying stage of their development. It only happens once for each of them.”

Journal pg.44 from Girls Bikes and the Park-“Rebecca made an artwork out of junk-she can see the beauty in everything.”
[I too try to see the beauty in life. I live on a lake and the nature of the place gives some comfort.]

Journal pg.63-Rebecca’s 5th Birthday-“I feel wonderful about it being Rebecca’s Birthday-she lights up my life.” [I have missed so many and do not want to miss anymore. I have a hard time on your birthdays but pray you are well and keep you in a special place in my heart.]

Journal pg.81-“Sunny and fair for Rebecca’s graduation from Sunshine Nursery School, we have her home for the summer.” [Congratulations on graduating from UMA with honors in Comparative Literature]

I am doing a lot better since writing the letter to J in November. I had to rebuild my life and move on or my spirit would have perished in depression over missing you and your sisters. I retired from the Fire Dept.early [there were too many reminders in our home town] and returned to University to study English Language, Literature and Creative Writing. I have always been interested in writing and also wished to experience what my girls were doing. Finishing school in 2010 led to a deepening of depression as years had gone by with none of you reaching out to me. In November I started volunteering at the Veterans Health Center during the week. Two or three nights a week I volunteer at a Music Hall in NH and get to see the shows for free. Music has always been a spiritual connection in my life. Volunteering helped me get through the worst of it.

Now on a cloudy, foggy and misty early spring day as the first fisherman casts a line where the lake ice has left the western shore I cast a hope into the new season. Just as with fishing I know not if the line will reach you and if it does if it will be taken. Luck and hope are common denominators. I pray you get the letter and consider my truth with the perspective of critical thinking that you used to get honors at UMA.
I Love You-Dad
daughters and a fathers love are forever